Thursday, April 21, 2011


I'm on vacation this week, spending Easter break with Émilie. The weather's been atrocious, but we're trying to make the best of it. Yesterday, we dyed Easter eggs, something I don't think I've done since I was six years old!

This Mother-Daughter time has helped me on my journey to a place of healing and acceptance (as have your thoughtful comments and emails following my last post). It's made me realize that it's not her deafness that's bothering me (or technically her half-deafness, since she can still hear perfectly with her left ear), it's the fact that her tumour had an impact on her life at all. Pilocytic astrocytoma was beyond my nursing abilities. My special Mommy-powers couldn't make it go away. I couldn't kiss it and make it better.

At some point, all parents come to the realization that there are many some things in their children's lives that are beyond their control or influence. They generally don't have to face up to that when their kids are six, that's all...

So, yeah... healing. Émilie's still our sweet girl. She's happy and imaginative and creative and funny and independent, just as she always was. It'll be OK.

In the meantime, I'm busting a move on my current socks in progress, I've already got the yarn picked out for my next project, and I'm playing with fabric a LOT, which usually means a sewing project will manifest itself in the next few days.

Happy Knitting, Everyone!


sapphireblue said...

Life throws some crazy curveballs at us. If anyone can help her adapt and overcome this, it will be you. You're a good mommy.

Knit and Purl Mama said...

That's so nice you get to spend the week with her. I agree with Sapphireblue, if anyone can help Emilie through this, it's you. She's lucky to have you as a mom.

Egg dying sounds like so much fun. I don't even recall the last time I dyed eggs.. also years ago.

Laurie said...

Egg dyeing sound like the perfect way to start healing from this. I know it's not at all the same thing, but I've been going through similar feelings as my old dog ages. I was always able to protect him from bad stuff, unfriendly dogs, unfriendly people, big, scary thunderstorms...but I can't protect him from arthritis or other symptoms of aging. I can't make him stay a puppy forever.

Emilie is a lucky girl to have you for her mother, and I know you'll both be just fine. :-)

dawn said...

Such a helpless feeling...not being able to fix it and make it better. There is hope and together you can all make it through this.

Sinéad said...

Happy Easter! I love your dyed eggs. I've never done that. We just scoff chocolate ones here. :) I'm glad to hear you got to spend some time together this week, it sounds like you two had some much needed time together.