Today's a very special day at Casa de Dear. Wait, special isn't the right word. It's significant and imbued with meaning for our family. It was on this day, one year ago, that we discovered our daughter Émilie had a brain tumour.
For the past week, Phil and I (and our extended family) have been nervously apprehending this day, this anniversary. Remembering the... bewilderment that we felt during that awful, awful time. The helplessness. The profound ache and grief that you feel, as a parent, when your child is afflicted with a serious disease. The rage you feel because damn it, it's unfair, and wrong, and just doesn't make sense at all and yet, there's absolutely nothing you can do about it.
Trust me when I say that it's very, very easy to get buried in sorrow when thinking about that day, December 29th, 2010.
Having said that, when I get past the pain and sorrow of that day and actually look at the present, at December 29th, 2011? The overwhelming feeling isn't one of sorrow, or pain, or fear. It's one of relief. Of gratitude.
Relief that she doesn't have a tumour anymore. Gratitude that she's thriving, and happy, and apparently able to move on from that horrible ordeal. Relief that those feelings of bewilderment, of helplessness, of grief, are (fingers crossed) behind us. Gratitude that our daughter is still with us.
I guess December 29th is a good day after all.
Happy Knitting, Everyone.